Busy week

This week has been really full on. I actually had a winning Monday which was pretty nice, I won the early Stars 44 turbo for 3.5k and then the FTP 75 deepstack for 6.5k which meant that the first two months post-DOJ were my 4th and 5th best months ever for playing MTTs. The last two days have been horrible, I have played about 120 MTTs and FT bubbled five reasonable-sized tourneys..lots of spots where I'm CL with 30 left or have like 80bb with 15 left and end up busting out..coolers, suckouts or otherwise. I find I get more tired as the week goes on so today really frustrated me. Tomorrow's session is going to be fairly short, have an afternoon nap then go to the movies with Mell.

I had class Monday night which went awfully imo. I had a huge headache in class and my scene partner was killing it and I was struggling to match her level of intensity in the scene and so got some constructive criticism about being more intimate in the scene. I don't mind the criticism, our teacher is brilliant..very perceptive, but I guess I'm just not used to feeling like my rate of progress is this slow or feeling like the learning curve is insurmountable at times. Like when it comes to academic stuff I'm fairly confident I can quickly learn most concepts with a normal amount of effort, like if there is some new topic I don't wonder if I'll be able to understand it or whatever... but because this isn't really an academic exercise I just struggle from time to time and wonder why I put myself through it! I am really critical of myself in these kinds of areas so maybe I make it sound worse than it was, I'm not sure. Clearly the challenge is good for me and there IS a reason why I continue to put myself through it. Even though I did feel kinda dejected driving home, fuck I just hate giving up on a challenge especially when it's something that I enjoy. So I'm going to push on obviously (though I didn't really feel like that Monday) and see if I can move the needle a little bit more before the end of semester.

Also I have decided on a cash game coach, I have agreed to do some sessions with shootaa (Reid Young) who is an ex-LeggoPoker coach and someone who's videos and way of explaining concepts I have always enjoyed. I have uhmm'ed and ahhh'ed about what is the appropriate level of investment for what I'm trying to achieve. I can pay X amount to have a guy who beats 2/4-3/6 for 3ptbb coach me, someone who grinds every day and beats the games they currently play, or I can pay slightly more for someone like him who has beaten much higher stakes, coached all stakes for a number of years and has always appeared to have a great conceptual grasp of the game.

What I decided is that between my MTT experience and the 75k odd cash hands I've played lifetime I have a reasonable grasp of the actual game, but because of the mix and what I study I probably have some knowledge of some advanced concepts (particularly the math ones), as well as some gaps in some very basic cash game concepts, obviously both of which need to be further developed/leaked plugged, and both coaches could fix. But what I am really looking for is beyond that; I want someone that helps me change the way I currently think of and approach the game so I am less formulaic (think back to the 'Scrub' blog entry and you will get what I mean). Maybe both can do that, I'm not sure, but I decided to start at the top end and then if I feel I'm not getting value from the extra money or whatever I can move further down the price chain. I'm probably only going to be able to afford an hour a week, but I think it will inspire me to put more volume in during my spare time, and I also have some friends that have been really helpful when it comes to reviewing the odd spot which will fill the gaps between sessions.

The first thing I've done is create a 45 minute video of me playing 100nl sixmax on Stars at mostly reggish tables, and then he's going to use that to get a feel for the way I think about poker, write a detailed report on my play, some things to think about/areas to work on and then go from there using a variety of lesson styles.

This week there's been a ton of rumours going around about various sites going bust/leaving the Australian market etc, and obviously that concerns me since I don't consider it wise/feasible for me to go moving country just to play MTTs backed, even though I love it so much. In terms of opportunity cost if the market was going to be back in a few years I'd be way better off working for a hedge fund for a couple years and playing 5/10 at Crown or something on the weekend. Anyway I feel kind of anxious about the whole thing, like I'm really close to breaking through in a number of areas (including being unbacked) and really just hope the Australian poker ship holds together for a little while longer (if not permanently!).