Your Top 3 Influential Sources?

[barryashton]

Yeah thanks for the reply doc and hof.

I have to work as I have to support my 7 year old daughter and while mum woerks away it is very hard phisically and more so mentally.

I just thought you kept bringing up how great this drug is, I would ask if it can help me.

I dont drink alcohol beverages, I dont take any nonprescribed drugs and live for my Family.

Poker along with my daughter have been the 2 things that have kept me alive as losing my son last year was the worst thing that has ever happenned to me I know there are thousands of people worse off than me and have sufferred bigger losses.

But fuck how do they keep going , I take my hat off to them and hope that we all get through till then.

Fuck the world. Abia was the most honest genuine person I have ever met and I miss you bud sooo fukkinnn much.

Sorry for rambling but I didnt write the question for anything else than I wanted to know, I have about 4/6 weeks work left on this job and I gotta keep going. If you want to see my son google Abia Ashton as he was my hero.

[SkyNgger]

I just thought you kept bringing up how great this drug is, I would ask if it can help me.

Honestly, I don't think so. It's not really a pain-killer, and because the medication is blockaded in Australia to facilitate the corruption / exploitation / production of poison...you'd be subjected to those poisons if you went down that road, and I cannot see how that would be a good line to take.

But there would be medications that can assist, for sure. I'm just not educated enough to advise you adequately. There's nothing all that wrong with the field of psychiatry; it's just that psychiatrists are too often scummy types who demand you bestow an almost-religious like trust in their (far too often, incompetent) hands.

For mentally / physically exhausted, simply worn out...hmm. In the US, I think they'd just pile you full of Prozac and Valium. I'm uncomfortable with pretending to be a doctor, even though I'd back myself / Google up against your generic placebo snakeoil-vending, pan-handling psychiatrist. But medicines are complex; and there are contraindications and worse that can make shit go "oh", rapidly.

I honestly think you're looking at pain-killers, as a best short-term remedy. Long-term, you probably don't want to find yourself dependent on those little bastards, as they can turn on you and deliver a ruckus of pain.

The reason I suspect the above, is because I think most of the mood enhancers / stablisers tend to have narcotic (calming; i.e. snooze) side-effects - which would only benefit you if your exhaustion was due to fitful sleeping...which is a possibility, I suppose? If you're just overworked / drained, I can't see how any depressant is going to be a positive...and might even be dangerous if you're handling machinery / driving.

I know SSRIs generally won't make you tired, but that's kinda because they're more placebo than actually...real.

Once you get into "uppers" territory, I think you're limited to "controlled" / blockaded meds for attention-deficit disorders, and we're back to Square 1 after all. They haven't yet invented a medication for motivation yet, but we live in hope. But all rhetoric aside, definitely don't do anything without first checking with a doc (ESPECIALLY if you handle machinery, relaxants are super slippery customers, you feel alert one moment, next moment you could be half asleep / drooling).

It might be worth just asking the doc about trialling Ritalin (ADHD very rapid uptake stimulant). I suspect they'll be loathe to delve into stimulant territory, but therein lies the catch-22 of exhaustion / feeling wrecked. The meds are HEAVILY slanted towards "chilling" rather than "psyching".

Poker along with my daughter have been the 2 things that have kept me alive as losing my son last year was the worst thing that has ever happenned to me I know there are thousands of people worse off than me and have sufferred bigger losses.

Fcuk me...you coped with that shit, like sober? That's like...mental strength I wouldn't recognise. I'm speechless. I can't deal with a fairly blissful existence sober. fml

I definitely think it's time to get a walking cane from pharmaceutics - it's no wonder you're mentally drained. You'd have been running on sheer willpower for way too long...it's really almost sobering. Just one foot in front of the other kind of stuff, I bet...

Fuck the world.

You can say that again.

Sorry for rambling but I didnt write the question for anything else than I wanted to know, I have about 4/6 weeks work left on this job and I gotta keep going. If you want to see my son google Abia Ashton as he was my hero.

Please, NEVER APOLOGISE for rambling. It's an inalienable right, nay...a responsibility! am Googling now...

[SkyNgger]

Shit, I'm overwhelmed by feelings of inadequacy. I cannot begin to imagine...

For everyone that was fortunate enough to meet Abia would know how passionate he was about his beloved sport, and how he would not have us to wallow in sorry, but instead grab every opportunity and to take that inside line and make that impossible pass.

Sounds like a champion.

I don't know what to say. I'm humbled...

[SkyNgger]

...just..yeah. I'm such a coward. Massive respect for keeping it together for your family. That's got to be the definition of heroism, right there.

RIP

[barryashton]

Thanks for the reply Doc I balled my eyes out, Tawani is getting the flowers she bought today and lighting the candles for our mate. We pray to Abia each night as that is what she wants, we know he is real.

I ask him each night to give me strength to get through and again he has Never let me down, I thank you for your posting his Photo. He was a great rider but an even better person. So Fukin honest and never took drugs or drank, that was our deal.

I am very lucky to have a wonderful family both my wife Kabaru and son Lifu working in Karratha and my daughter with me finishing our place and packing away 18 years.

Look forward to reading more of your posts, I dont always understand them but enjoy them. Thanks for your time,Just had a bad day today.

[SkyNgger]

Thank you (and Abia) for the long-overdue reminder of what courage looks like, up close. The more I read, the more I realised how his life, was effectively the polar opposite of who I'd become. Whilst he was pushing himself to excel, afraid of nothing, living fully...I was hiding out, disgusted (sorely misplaced) at the world; terrified I might get my - feelings - hurt again. ugh.

And when tragedy leaves your family coping with what I cannot even comprehend (aside from the confronting realisation my departure would likely leave my family struggling to cope with...the annoyance of paperwork), I had been spending my time getting tilted at things as 'important' as overdue deliveries. ugh.

Nothing like a jolt of reality, to realign a twisted and corrupted perspective. So thank you.

[Hof]

...just..yeah. I'm such a coward. Massive respect for keeping it together for your family. That's got to be the definition of heroism, right there.

RIP

*********************************************

Wow, barryashton.

There is NO medicine for what you and your family have endured.

None.

Even time can never heal this completely.....

What possibly could?

No person on earth can truly understand/appreciate/comprehend how you feel until they have walked a mile in your life's shoes...

We can only empathize and be thankful that we are here, today, and can reflect on how precious life IS.

Actor John Wayne was interviewed before his 70th birthday and said this:

"Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday."

I only discovered this quote late last year and have tried my best to do it justice.

Thank you for sharing your story, barryashton.

Live your days precisely the way Abia would have wished......

[barryashton]

R I P my Son Fuck I miss you so much.

Very hard day today been a bad week but today his Abia Day in our house.

Went to his old Moto X track here in Derby at 5.45 am let a balloon go and tied 2 balloons on his old gate #22.

My wife and son arrived Tuesday morning 6am driving all night from Karratha after finishing work.

I can't beleive it has been 12 months as sometimes it feels like years and other days it feels like yesterday.

Having the family here is so much easier, Tawani is only 7 but wow she is my strength

She wants to race a 65cc and her nick will be Lil Woob #22, I can't say no but I hope she doesn't.

Abia was so special in so many ways, his respect for his family and love of his life Eleisha was unreal.

Today I will watch part 2 of his Celebration day from last year and look at his facebook for the first time. Little steps.

I love you and miss you so much .

I thank you for the best 18 years of my life, you were the best mate I have ever had. Much Respect.

Ride in Peace my Son . 24/12/1991 passed 25/05/2010.

Fuck this kunt of a world. The worst Beat of my life.

[DoctorDangerous]

R I P my Son Fuck I miss you so much.

Very hard day today been a bad week but today his Abia Day in our house.

Went to his old Moto X track here in Derby at 5.45 am let a balloon go and tied 2 balloons on his old gate #22.

My wife and son arrived Tuesday morning 6am driving all night from Karratha after finishing work.

I can't beleive it has been 12 months as sometimes it feels like years and other days it feels like yesterday.

Having the family here is so much easier, Tawani is only 7 but wow she is my strength

She wants to race a 65cc and her nick will be Lil Woob #22, I can't say no but I hope she doesn't.

Abia was so special in so many ways, his respect for his family and love of his life Eleisha was unreal.

Today I will watch part 2 of his Celebration day from last year and look at his facebook for the first time. Little steps.

I love you and miss you so much .

I thank you for the best 18 years of my life, you were the best mate I have ever had. Much Respect.

Ride in Peace my Son . 24/12/1991 passed 25/05/2010.

Fuck this kunt of a world. The worst Beat of my life.

Wiping tears from my eyes and off my keyboard...feel almost unworthy of comment here - all I can say is that from my experience, over time, the gift of the wonderful 18 years together slowly becomes stronger than the feeling of loss. Time, lots of time, is all we have.